I want to tell you about a small decision I made this week that’s changing everything for me in the midst of this season that tends to be particularly emotional for me.
On the surface, this post may seem to be about home decor, but really it’s about grief–and learning how to grieve well.
You see, I allowed myself to transition into the Christmas season early this year. And this one small decision has created so much space in my soul this week and been so unexpectedly life-giving.
I recently came across this post of the Nester’s on how your home can hold both the fall and winter together so that the transition between the seasons doesn’t feel so abrupt and jolting. This was the gentle boost I needed.
You see, I grew up believing that any inkling of Christmas before Thanksgiving was basically sacrilege. As an adult, I carried this belief system into my own home and family traditions. But doing so created a suffocating overwhelm and busyness, specifically Thanksgiving weekend, and stole a lot of joy for me. I couldn’t handle it anymore. Here’s why…
I LOVE the Christmas season. LOVE it. So as soon as Thanksgiving is done, Christmas tree and decor HAD to go up. I wanted to celebrate and savor every day, and my home needed to be ready. But December 1st is my daughter’s birthday. Even though she’s no longer with us, we take time to remember and celebrate her every year. But everything always felt rushed and stressful and like there was barely any space left for presence or grief. I didn’t want that this year. So I made a change.
I gave myself permission to put away some of the fall decorations and pull out some of the Christmas ones early. The decor is simple with elements of fall and Christmas intertwined. My home feels spacious and beautiful and peaceful. And my heart feels like it’s a reflection of this.
I will fully celebrate Thanksgiving. And come Thanksgiving weekend, my family and I will put up our tree. And that’s all I’ll have to do. I will be present in the tradition with my people and with the Lord. And then come Sunday, my daughter’s birthday, that will be her day. I will have space to be present. Joy and grief will have room. Literally and figuratively.
This one small decision has made this time of year feel free and made room to hold all the joy and sorrow and grief and gratitude. This little decision has been the best decision for me this year.
If you have any grief anniversaries around this time of year or the transitions between seasons is hard, what is one small thing you can do to be present and make space–in your heart and home, for yourself, your people, and the Lord?
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